Animated objects are a pretty broad category and as presented in the Monster Manual they are basically what I refer to as "Constructs of Opportunity." They are mindless automatons that do nothing but prescribed tasks in response to an outside stimulus. However, the best "Animated Objects" from popular media that I will draw on are more appropriately referred to as "Awoken" as they have been personified with human-like emotion.
I will be drawing on Aladdin, Camelot, Harry Potter, and Fantasia in these examples. Fantasia is probably the best example of a true animated object, however even it has an interesting twist. There is an interesting intersection between intelligent magical swords and awoken objects.
First are Spear-Pigs. When magic is used to give animal instinct to a weapon the result can be a dangerous beast. Pigs are ideal candidates given their high intellect, large builds, and voracious appetites. Below is the spear-pig.
Spear-Pig
AC 7 (12), HD 3 (13hp), Att 1 x spear
(1d8), THAC0 17 (+2)
MV 150’ (50’)
Walk, SV D12 W13 P14 B15 S16, ML 9, AL N, XP 35, NA 1d6 (1d6), TT None
- Charge: Given at least 10' to attack the spear pig deals 2d8 damage.
- Description: Fat sloppy beast with a spear protruding from between its beady eyes. How do you know that it thinks you are food?
- Combat: Spear-Pigs attack by charging their prey. The will repeatedly charge and retreat.
- To
Avoid: Spear-Pigs are always hungry and is used to eating carrion and scraps provided by its masters. Providing it food will distract it for 1d4 rounds (until its done eating).
- Treasure: The spear protruding from its head is connected to its spine. If removed it functions as a +1 spear.
Flying carpets are common fantasy tropes, but nobody did it better than Aladdin.
Flying Carpet
AC 7
(12),
HD 2 (9hp), Att
1
x wrap (paralyzed)
THAC0
18 (+1)
MV 240’ (80’) Fly,
SV
D12
W13
P14
B15
S16,
ML 7,
AL N,
XP 20,
NA 1
(0),
TT Non
- Construct: Make no noise until they attack. Immune to effects that affect living creatures (i.e. poison). Immune to mind-affecting or mind-reading spells (e.g. charm, hold, sleep).
- Vulnerable: Double damage from fire.
- Surprise: 4-in-6 chance to surprise, looks like a normal carpet.
- Wrap: Ogre size or smaller creatures must Save vs. Paralyze or be paralyzed by the constricting carpet.
- Description: An ornate woven carpet with vibrant patterns and luxurious tassels. What makes it look curious?
- Combat: Flying carpets are shy and if given the opportunity would rather flee than fight.
- Avoid: Carpets are always looking for companions and if treated with respect they can become loyal friends with dog-like intelligence. However, if consistently mistreated they will flee.
An evil sorting hat used for the interrogation of prisoners.
Inquisitor's Hood
AC 7
(12),
HD 2 (9hp), Att 1x Blind & Constrict
THAC0
18 (+1)
MV 90’ (30’) Fly,
SV
D12
W13
P14
B15
S16,
ML 12,
AL N,
XP 20,
NA 1
(0),
TT None
- Construct: Make no noise until they attack. Immune to effects that affect living creatures (i.e. poison). Immune to mind-affecting or mind-reading spells (e.g. charm, hold, sleep).
- Blind & Constrict: A creature must Save vs. Death or be blinded and begin choking. They will die in 2d4 rounds. Shouting a secret that is harmful or embarrassing either to themselves or someone the victim cares about will give them another 1d4 rounds of breath per secret.
- Description: A black hood with no eye holes and a leather drawstring around the neck. What is your darkest secret?
- Combat: When a creature gets within 30' of an Inquisitor's Hood it will fly wrap itself around the head of the victim. When a creature dies it will suck out their brains in 2d6 hours. It must eat 1 brain per month to stay alive.
- Avoid: Inquisitors Hoods are often kept locked up. Being able to telepathically communicate (Helm of Telepathy, ESP, etc) allows a character to automatically control the Inquisitor's Hood.
Apprentice's Broom
AC 7
(12), HD 1*
(4hp),
Att 1x Bash (1d4), THAC0 19
(+0),
MV 90’
(30’),
SV
D12 W13 P14 B15 S16, ML
12,
AL
N,
XP 20,
NA 2d4
(0), TT
None
- Mundane
Damage Immunity: Can
only be harmed by magic attacks or fire.
- Immunity: Unharmed by gas, unaffected by charm, hold, and sleep spells.
- Split: Whenever the Apprentice Broom takes damage from non-damaging sources it instead splits into +1d4 identical copies of itself.
- Description: A common broom animated to complete a repetitive task. What task is it doing?
- Combat: If the broom's task is interrupted it will attack violently.
- Avoid: Do not interrupt what the broom is doing, even accidentally. As long as it is unbothered it will continue to mindlessly complete its orders.
